The need to be loved and love back

Is it a real need and is it one of the basic needs in our lives?
There’s been a quite long debate on whether people have a need such as a ‘sense of belonging’ or whether the can live totally independent and alone.
The stories we hear about, see and experience show, that even if there is no emotional partner in ones life, this is compensated by very close relationships to parents, friends, colleagues or occasionally even to some stranger. Those who deny this urge time and time again, relapse and thus try to overcompensate by obsessing about it.
Denial is something extremely powerful, which can affect the prioritisation of our aims so much, that it results in obsession and consequently regret and sorrow.
Denial comes from our lack of self-awareness, confusion and fear; the main incentive for people’s decisions and their momentum in life.
I believe that the necessity to love and be loved back, if not the most important need in life, certainly is an essential one. In order to deal with this urge in a healthy manner you should get to know yourself thoroughly and love yourself for who you are and what you do. Consequently respect yourself enough, to pursue your dreams and goals. And finally love the universe, which inspires us to move forward in life.
Optimization is the key to keep the balance in what we want so badly and what we really need. The combination of harsh and fearless self-awareness in order to find what really lies underneath, experience and a sensible mind is maybe the best not the cheapest means of pursuing it.
How do we define the love?
Real love means freedom, not limitations. And what really makes it dreadful is simply the lack of control; that we can almost forgive our beloved ones everything right away and be happy for their happiness.